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It may be a totally legit question. It all depends on which word the emphasis is put. How the question is spoken can make it an acceptable query for more information. It can also let you know someone thinks you are just a bit off your rocker. Those seven words can invite engaging conversation. They can also make us feel like idiots, less than human, up for the “stupid of the year” award. All of that is going on in our brain, the center of our intellectual dimension where our intellect and responses/reactions to life come from.
The best of mentors will make these four commitments on the intellectual dimension of life to themselves and all those they mentor:
I commit to nourishing my intellect
to study, learn, and master concepts
that add value to life: others and my own.
You’ve heard, no doubt, the saying when speaking of what we put into our brains, “Garbage in. Garbage out.” We are all tempted to pay attention to the plethora of media messages that bombard us daily. It can be overwhelming.
However, a daily, active commitment to feeding your intellect that which will be life and hope to others, and yourself, makes what you put into your brain a life-giving or life-taking choice. As a mentor, part of my responsibility in walking into the future with leaders is to encourage these exceptional souls to choose life, not the clutter that depletes life.
I commit to developing a life-long curiosity
for exploring new ideas and gleaning information.
Curious people. People who ask questions are some of my favorite people on the planet. I admit, this is a bit corny, but, I often tell those emerging leaders I mentor that the only “bad” question they may have is the one they are not asking. Meaning? There are no questions in our mentoring model that are off limits.
Questions water the fertile ground of our minds. Questions, being curious, daring to be even outrageously curious, are all welcome within our LDG Mentoring Model: The Circle of Life in 8 Dimensions. Questions particularly engage the intellectual dimension.
Mentor or mentoree, momentary stranger, or with a life-long friend, there is a courtesy that comes with curiosity. “May I ask you a question…….?”
Rarely has that question been turned down. Often that question takes me, whether with my wife, a close friend, valued mentoree, total stranger, to some places we would not have gone without it being asked.
As a leadership mentor I tell each person I mentor that they may ask me any question they may have. No holds barred. The way is modeled by asking them questions, as well.
Of course, some questions may be inappropriate to the situation: i.e. no matter how curious they or I may be, we really don’t need to know how much money is in our checking accounts. You get the drift. 🙂
I will commit to being diligent
at making focused, creative, critical thinking
a life-giving habit.
A few days ago, one of the eager to learn and grow emerging business leaders I mentor sent me this the day before we met:
“I just got back from a three-day leadership conference sponsored by my national firm (this man is one of his company’s regional leaders here in the Rockies with one of his responsibilities being the growing success of over 90 local people in this fast-growing organization). While there I kept thinking about where you are encouraging me to go with our mentoring.
You talk about intentional, deep-change, whole-life, transformational mentoring throughout all my life. I have a lot of questions around transformational thinking. Bottom line, I believe my thought processes both about myself and others isn’t big enough or positive enough, and I want to learn how to take control of my own mind!”
That alert, before we met for our time together, brought us to have the most productive mentoring moments yet in our developing friendship. His deep desire to learn and grow, his curiosity, has set us up for the next several times we meet. I applaud his courage!
I will commit to making it a life-long habit
to honor the amazing functions
of that massive computer
between my ears:
my brain.
On purpose, we talk about the Emotional Dimension of the Circle of Life and the Intellectual Dimension. As does most of our life and responses to life, the amazing brain in your head governs all of who you are. How we think. How we feel. How we maintain our physical health and all our relationships. What we do with our lives physically, vocationally, financially. How creative, innovative, designful and playful we care and dare to become. All of this is influenced, nurtured and supported by what takes place in our brain.
One of the more informative books I’ve read, helpful to the max, in all the relational perspectives I have across the 8 dimensions of my own life is one called Spark: The Revolutionary New Science of Exercise and the Brain by Dr. John J. Ratey. Dr. Ratey is a professor at the Harvard Medical School. This book has deeply influenced my own life and all of my mentoring.
Get it. Read it. Put it into practice for yourself and all those good souls who are intentional enough to ask you, “Would you think about mentoring me?”
The commitment to be the best mentor you can be comes from your brain, and all it connects to. What an adventure we are on in the mentoring of others. What a privilege. We are here to help you be the best mentor you can possibly be.
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