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I am still, even after 40+ years of full time mentoring, humbled and honored when someone inquires if I would spend time with them exploring their life and helping them discover their future.
One of the hard parts of being a mentor is that I’m not able to spend time with all who ask. That is one of the important reasons for Leadership Design Group, to help you be the mentor you certainly can be. If someone is asking you to mentor them, then that brilliant soul knows you have that possibility within you. Accept that.
Now what?
Some people you and I know seem to be born with the capacity to mentor. People seem to be naturally attracted to them. Stop for a moment and reflect on what it is that makes that possible? What have you seen or experienced from such people?
Some reading this might say, “I’m not sure if I can be a mentor. Some parts of my own life need some mentoring. Do I really have what it takes?”
Again, if someone has asked you to mentor them, then I think you do have what it takes. If you’ve yet to be asked to be a mentor, then I still think you have what it takes, or you probably would not be reading within this blog. Seriously.
The best of mentors know they do not have all the answers.
Those who ask us to mentor them are not looking for us to be perfect. Thankfully! In fact, it’s our role as a healthy mentor to often remind the mentoree that we don’t. Like them, we, too, are in process.
However, it is important to assure them that we will walk with them into their future. Those I mentor know that exploring and discovering is part of what I can do with them, not for them. When healthy decisions are the result of exploring and discovering, we celebrate what they have learned and how they have grown from the experience.
The best of mentors are willing to explore and discover their own future.
As a mentor you and I need to remain committed to stay curious and on the grow within our own lives and relationships, with the 8 Dimensions of our own lives. When you are consistent with that commitment, you are well on your way to being a good mentor.
We need to continually keep in mind that mentoring moments are about those we mentor, not you, not me. Yes, we can share parts of our own story. Knowing the mentor has also struggled, overcome, grown, changed and is continuing to thrive begins to model what’s possible for the those being mentored. But the time spent with those who ask for mentoring is for their forward, unique and life-changing growth.
The best of mentors make the time to invest in those who ask.
When asked to be someone’s mentor, do your best to make certain you will deliver on the time necessary. This is a time to be honest with the time you have. The person you mentor needs to know they can count on you.
Suggested in the prior blog post is that timing needs to be mutual. Rarely do I see someone weekly, unless important for whatever is being explored. Often the mentoring moments happen every other week, or every third week. Some I mentor monthly, or even every six weeks. Basically, between you and those you mentor, what mutually works?
I will share this “secret” with you that helps bring a life-changing consistency to our mentoring times. Ya, sure, this can sound a little corny, but, hey!, it works.
With those I mentor I use what we call “three aheads.” That means we put into our mutual calendars the next scheduled time, and then two more. That way we always have three times scheduled into the future.
Why this? This way, if they need to cancel a next time, or I do, for whatever the reason, we still have two more mentoring moments in the schedule. We do not have to scramble for a next time. This is a major part of the intentionality of good mentoring.
Now, dare to become a mentor. You are needed in that role. This website is a part of what we are about to help you be further formed as a mentor and to support you as you share life with that good soul who has asked for your valuable time.
You can do this.
The person who sought you out knows that. We are here to encourage you forward.
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